The Ad-dressing Of Cats (From The Motion Picture Soundtrack "Cats")

So first, your memory I'll jog
And say, a cat is not a dog

With cats, some say one rule is true
Don't speak till you are spoken to
Myself, I do not hold with that
I say you should address a cat
But always bear in mind that he
Resents familiarity
You bow, and taking off your hat
Address him in this form, "Oh, cat"

Oh, cat

Before a cat will condescend
To treat you as a trusted friend
Some little token of esteem
Is needed, like a dish of cream
Or you might now and then supply
Some caviar or Strasbourg pie
Some potted grouse or salmon paste
He's sure to have his personal taste
And so in time, you'll reach your aim
And call him by his name

A cat's entitled to expect
These evidences of respect
So this is this and that is that
And that's how you address a cat